2023.12金十二校读后续写解析
For courage,my fingers clung to the harness(背带、保护带)on Cho's broad back as we passed the fence of my neighbor Mr. Groll's yard.
Walking by Mr. Groll's yard is the best part of our morning walk, and also the worst. It is the best part because the roses talk to us. “Good morning, Cho,”whisper the rose scents to my guide dog's nose. Other roses shout to me,“Hello, Mai!”Now comes the worst part: Mr. Groll. As usual, friendly Ch thumps her tail. But Ch6 is just a dog; how can she know that this neighbor does not like me at all?“Hello, Mr. Groll.”I greeted him as I did every morning. And like every other morning, he didnot answer me. ButIknewhe was there, watching, behind his fence.He always sounds out ofbreath.and the creaky gate swings nervously in his hand.Maybe he's afraid of me because I'm blind. Disabilities do scare grown-ups sometimes. Then I remembered: the other day I heard him playing checkers (西洋跳棋)with my friend Jimmy, who's in a wheelchair.Ch6 and I marched on, and my thoughts kept step. Why did Mr. Groll ignore me? It's a mystery to me.
Papa has told me that some folks do not like people from faraway places. Does this solve the mystery? Maybe Mr. Groll does not like neighbors from faraway places. No, that can't be it. Every Saturday Mr. G
roll and my big brother, Lien, help each other with yard work. They are friends.Well, then, I wondered, why wouldn’t he talk to me? The toe of my shoe scuffed the sidewalk.and I think, maybe he didn't like me because I'm a girl. The sidewalk hummed beneath my feet. Askateboard zoomed by. “Hello, Mai and Cho!”my friend Jana yelled. “Hi, Mr. Groll”I waited. If Mr. Groll ignored Jana, then the mystery was solved. But his voice called out, “Hello, Jana!”Paragraph 1: The sound of it twisted my heart.
Paragraph 2: “It is Ch6 that scares my words away.”he replied.
【重难点讲解】
划线第一句话表达了主人公Mai和她的导盲犬Chó在邻居Mr. Groll的花园旁边经过时，花朵仿佛与他们对话的意象。花的香气对Chó的鼻子轻声细语地说：“早上好，Chó”，而其他的花则向Mai大声喊：“你好，Mai！”Mai作为盲人，眼睛虽然看不见，但是听觉是很好的，这种描写通过赋予花朵生命和语言的特性，传达了一种温馨和友好的氛围，也表现了Mai的乐观，与其在邻里中感到的其他情感形成鲜明对比。
划线第二句话描绘了主人公Mai行走在人行道上时的感觉。通过使用动词“hummed”，赋予了人行道一种生动的感觉，好像它在和 Mai 的脚步一同发出某种低沉而持续的声音。这样的描写可以传达出一种我和邻居
亲近自然、融入环境的感觉，同时强调了Mai与周围环境的联系。
【情节梳理】
人物：这篇文章主要出现了七个人物分别是Mai, Chó(the guide dog), Mr. Groll(the neighbor), Jimmy (Mai’s friend in a wheelchair), Jana (Mai’s friend), Lien (Mai’s big brother), Papa (Mai’s father) 主要还是围绕前三个来展开。Mai：一个盲人女孩，有一只导盲犬Chó，很友好，每天早上都和格罗尔先生打招呼，尽管他显然很冷漠。
Chó：Mai的导盲犬，是她的忠实伙伴。
Mr. Groll：Mai的邻居，看上去不太友好和冷漠，但实际上有原因。
视角：
Mai的第一人称视角叙述
主题：
误解和化解。Mai 试图理解为什么邻居Mr. Groll对她不友好，最后通过他们交流打破了障碍，结交了朋友，弥合两人之间的鸿沟。
【段首句解读以及解题思路】
段首句一：The sound of it twisted my heart. 它的声音揪着我的心。
段首句二：“It is Chóthat scares my words away.”he replied. “是Chó吓得我说不出话来。”他回答说。
上文讲到，Mai猜测邻居Mr. Groll对她不友好的原因，有残疾、远道而来抑或是女孩，但分别通过Jimmy (Mai’s friend in a wheelchair), Lien (Mai’s big brother), Jana (Mai’s friend)三个人物分别排除。因此当最后Mr. Groll 与Jana打招呼的时候，那个声音揪着Mai的心，百思不得其解。从段首句二我们可以得知原因在于Chó，Mr. Groll害怕这只导盲犬。这里其实从上文第四段“And like every other morning, he did not answer me. But I knew he was there, watching, behind his fence. He always sounds out of breath, and the creaky gate swings nervously in his hand.”这句话也可以感知。并由这句话反推，第一段结尾Mai是去询问对其冷漠的原因。前面部分可以写Mai鼓起勇气去和邻居进行面对面交流，最后引入询问。
第二段在得知真正的原因后，可以写Mai的反应，可以是安慰Mr. Groll也可以是部分歉疚，并表示Chó的友善并不会伤人。可以适当加入Chó的描写，可以从尾巴、舌头、脑袋等入手，表现人畜无害。最后可以写Mai和Mr. Groll化解了之前的误会，成为了朋友。
【优秀习作】
The sound of it twisted my heart. I indeed didn’t understand why Mr. Groll treated me in such a way. Standing in front of his house, I was lost in thought for a long time. Finally, I still screwed up the courage to confront the enigma. Heading to Mr. Groll’s gate, I ventured, “Mr. Groll, why do you never respond to my greetings? Is it because I’m blind or maybe because I’m a girl…”The unanswered queries lingered, and my fingers clung tighter to Chó’s harness as we stood at the edge of the yard.
“It is Chóthat scares my words away.”he replied. Upon discovering the truth, shock coursed through me. But soon he pressed on, “I have a fear of dogs, you see. It’s not about you being blind or a girl; it’s my own discomfort.”At this, with empathy in my heart, I reassured him, “Chóis gentle and well-trained. She won’t harm anyone.”Then, I directed Chóto come forward and get down. Chówas licking Mr. Groll’s shoes mildly. The tension in the air seemed to subside with Mr. Groll affectionately ruffling Chó’s fur. Finally, the misunderstanding unraveled, and a seed of friendship between us would gradually blossom in that very garden.
【参考范文】
The sound of it twisted my heart. Now I understood something I didn’t know before: unfriendly Mr. Groll likes Jimmy. And Lien. And Jana. But not me and Chó... Not Me and Chó! An idea brightened m
y mystery. But I should know why Mr. Groll didn’t talk to me! Repulsed by confusion, as well as irritation, I felt my way along the fence to approach my neighbour. The gate squeaked open. “Mai! Be careful!”Mr. Groll’s startled voice steadied my courage while his hand steadied my elbow. “You can please solve my mystery,”I stammered. “Is it because I’m blind that you don’t like me? Or because I am a girl from a faraway land?”
“It is Cho that scares my words away.”he replied. “I like you, just as I like Lien, and Jana,”he sounded breathless, maybe because of anxiety or eagerness. “But you know, I am just afraid of your dog.”he continued. His earnest explanation made everything come to light. “Come with me.”I told him, “Make acquaintance with Chó.”I led him to Chó, and told Mr. Groll how gentle Chówas. Then I took Mr. Groll’s hand in mine and guided it to Cho’s head. Hesitantly, Mr. Groll stroked Cho’s ears. Friendly Chóthumped her tail. And now that the mystery was solved, our new friendship could begin.